It’s not all-inclusive, but definitely interesting. There were many more takeaways from the researcher’s work including demographic trends and budgeting for tips; here are some that weren’t included in the chart that I found interesting about other professions:
- Apparently no one tips flight attendants, and if you do, you’ll probably receive free drinks thereafter.
- Golf caddies say that golfers tip better when they play better, but they always tip the best when it’s happening in front of clients.
- Tattoo artists expect $10-20 on a $100 job and $40-60 on a $400 job, but they get nothing from 30% of people.
- A massage therapist expects a $15-20 tip and receives one 95% of the time—about half of a massage therapist’s income is tips.
- A whitewater rafting guide said he always got the best tips after a raft flipped over or something happened where people felt in danger.
- Strippers not only usually receive no salary, they often receive a negative salary—i.e. they need to pay the club a fee in order to work there.
When an email arrives in an undoubtably professional context that contains a smiley face, I do a double take. On one hand, it certainly creates a warm tone in a way that Kind Regards never will be able to do. On the other hand, we’re not in junior high and we don’t need to be cutesy to convey warmth. I’ve invoked the smiley on a few rare professional occasions, and I never quite know why I hit send even though I don’t feel stupid for it either. As long as it’s used in a ‘normal’ written flow, a smiley will probably be harmless because it has a positive connotation. As with pokes on Facebook from folks of a different generation or a certain type of relationship, however, it could be seen as creepy or inappropriate, albeit unknowingly so.
Verdict: As I often argue, people
are should be hired for their overall selves as much as for how well they can directly fill their professional shoes. If it’s within a person’s written repertoire to occasionally smile, let ‘em smile if they feel so moved. It’s not hurting anybody, just raising some eyebrows.
There is no passive-aggressive, conditional, manipulative nonsense behind my statement. I mean what I say. She doesn’t have to hug or kiss anyone just because I say so, not even me. I will not override my own child’s currently strong instincts to back off from touching someone who she chooses not to touch.
Katia Hetter, on how she gives her 4 year old daughter the choice between hugging/kissing people, or not. She emphasizes the need for a child to be respectful but also for parents and others to be respectful of the child’s personal comfort zone and instinct.
Although I think the article goes a little far with the implications of allowing a child to choose their own polite greeting, I respect its perspective and agree very much that it should never be seen as disrespectful if a child – or anyone, really – is not physically affectionate; people should not feel hurt or offended if other respectful measures are there. Further, I respect the view asserted here that conforming to convention just to please someone shouldn’t be taught; kids will learn on their own through observation and practice, and can then make their own decisions on how they’d like to conduct themselves.
Of course, it’s not that simple – certain things are a parent’s job to teach and discipline can be taught if not self-imposed – but social conventions learned by instinct and trial and error rather than instruction are much more openly embraced (so to speak).
(But, what do I know! This isn’t a parenting blog!)